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Monday, February 8, 2016
Southern Weather Radar


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    satire

    Task Force Created to Attack Fearbola

    by | Dec 11, 2015
    Fear terror eye by @Doug88888

    The American Medical Association has announced Fearbola is now recognized as a legitimate disease and warrants further investigation by the medical profession as to treatment and prevention.

    “The abnormal and uncontrollable fear of terrorists can have profound detrimental impact on the individual as well as our economy if it goes untreated,” said Dr. Oscar Kemper of the AMA. “Having people afraid to leave their homes and live in fear of what might happen is a recipe for a neutered society.”

     

     

    satire

    Republicans Introduce Legislation to Make Guns and Ammo Affordable for All Americans

    by | Dec 8, 2015
    Guns Over People by Mario Piperni

    Congressional Republicans moved swiftly Tuesday to change the subject from banishing all Muslims from entering this country to passing new legislation that will make it beside the point because every single American will have a gun.

    If passed, the Affordable Guns & Ammo Act (AG&AA) will cut prices on assault rifles for middle class families by as much as 40 percent and require employers to buy workers up to 1000 rounds a month, or face stiff fines, said GOP officials.

     

     

    sensible gun laws now

    In Nothing We Trust

    by | Dec 4, 2015
    In Nothing We Trust

    Congress and the Senate today vowed to do everything in their power to do absolutely nothing about the mass shootings today. Which shooting you ask? I don’t know, pick one, there are far too many to keep track of.

    The Speaker of the house, Paul Ryan, in an interview today said “We don’t want to rush to judgment and take away the rights from any red-blooded, all-American, shit-for-brains that simply wants a big-ass gun. His right to stupid supersedes your right to life, liberty and the pursuit of breathing…

     

     

    truth v lie

    To Those Who Say “A Pox on Both Your Houses,” I Say “A Pox on You”

    by | Dec 4, 2015
    To Those Who Say “A Pox on Both Your Houses,” I Say “A Pox on You”

    To those of you confronted with opponents who blame both parties, or people who quote a supposed Obama or Clinton “lie”, let this piece become your irrefutable weapon,—you need not waste your breath again in pointless circular debates with people who have trouble thinking critically. The following will finally put the last nail into the false false equivalent argument -the last refuge of the Stupidparty disciple.

    “[The Stupidparty] has become an insurgent outlier. It has become ideologically extreme; contemptuous of the inherited social and economic policy regime; scornful of compromise; unpersuaded by conventional understanding of facts, evidence, and science…

     

     

    police killing of caroline small

    “Just Like Deer Hunting”

    by | Dec 4, 2015
    Caroline Small Glynn County Shooting by Police

    It was well covered in the news, the local reporter says. And, indeed, the Atlanta Journal Constitution has been on the story for a long time. After all, the shooting of Caroline Small, by two Glynn County, Georgia, cops, occurred over five years ago, well before cops shooting citizens became a topic of national disgust.

    About a month ago, some strangers with a camera showed up at the Glynn County Commission meeting, but nobody knew why they were there. The only thing that happened that night, which the visitors might have noted, but probably didn’t, was that the Commission passed an imprudent resolution…

     

     

    spreading despair not helping.

    Dangerous or Wonderful, the Choice Is Ours

    by | Dec 3, 2015
    What a Wonderful World by George Landon

    It’s a sad sentiment voiced loudly and with much distress in these times: what a dangerous world we live in! It’s as true as it always has been.

    I don’t remember the exact moment I was sentenced to die. Then again, it was over 56 years ago and I was but a millisecond old at the time. Yet, the instant I welcomed that first gasping breath into my infant lungs, I also accepted my fate. Someday, I would die.

    It wasn’t that day – nor has it happened with any of the roughly 20,513 sunrises since. But it will. I surely didn’t know then, but it’s been a fact of my life for a long, long time now that someday it will end.

     

     

    he'd never fall for it

    Would a deadlocked GOP Convention turn to someone not running?

    by | Dec 3, 2015
    Would a deadlocked GOP Convention turn to someone not running?

    This election season has produced a bumper crop of candidates for the Republican nomination, but just a few seeking the Democratic nomination. After some dropouts in both parties, the list now stands at 11 Republican and three Democrats still running.

    While we question whether Hillary Clinton will win the Democratic nomination, she is moving closer to locking it up. And as we get closer to the first big test, the Iowa caucuses on February l, those 11 Republicans still running…

     

     

    living in a secular society

    The Muslim Bartender (A True Story)

    by | Nov 30, 2015
    Rhetorical Butler

    “You are not being persecuted for your beliefs when you are merely being denied the privilege of shoving them down someone else’s throat.” – The Bard of Affliction

    Several months ago, there was a lot of Sturm und Drang over one Kim Davis, a Kentucky county clerk who had garnered a certain amount of notoriety for having refused to issue wedding licenses to same-sex couples despite having been ordered by the courts to do so. Putting her name on said licenses would (she had said) imply her approval of same-sex marriages, something she felt she could not do based on her religious beliefs.

     

     

    invisible dragons

    Pilgrims On A Tempest-Tossed Sea

    by | Nov 29, 2015
    Refugee Boat Sinks in Mediterranean

    A friend recently told me that her great grandmother to the ninth generation was aboard the Mayflower. The young lady in question arrived in what was to become this country when she was only four. Living to be eighty-three and becoming a matriarch directly linked to at least fifty grandchildren, she was obviously a most incredible woman. But what also struck me about her story was that her future father-in-law was the leader of a Purists/Separatists/Dissenters group in Holland. In one of his sermons, he said: “But now we are all, in all places, strangers and pilgrims, travelers and sojourners.”

     

     

    in the wake of paris

    Obama Orders EPA to Reduce Republican BS Emissions

    by | Nov 24, 2015
    Dangerous BS Emissions from GOP Candidates Cause EPA Action

    President Barack Obama issued an executive order Tuesday requiring the Environmental Protection Agency to crack down on Republican BS emissions that have risen dramatically in recent weeks.

    “We are facing a crisis in this country and what we need to get through it is clear thinking and what we need for clear thinking is clean air and what we’ve got it too much BS,” said Obama in a morning press conference.

    “I’ve asked the EPA to step in and start fining offenders…

     

     

    meet me in dabiq

    The Apocalypse

    by | Nov 18, 2015
    the Apocalypse by Ludwig Ferdinand Schnorr von Carolsfeld

    Were I to tell you a story in which Jesus, the son of the virgin Mary, was sent by God to guide the children of Israel, perform miracles including curing blindness, raising the dead and casting out demons, was crucified and raised alive into heaven to be the God incarnate. Jesus, who is promised to come back as the Messiah on judgement day to lead God’s army against the armies of Rome led by the Antichrist to the final victory in Jerusalem. What holy book do you think that would be from?

     

     

    power and terror:

    Conflict, Hegemony and the Rule of Force by Noam Chomsky

    by | Nov 15, 2015
    Mobster - an illustration by Tom Ferguson

    In an interview with ABC news correspondent Martha Raddatz pointed out to Dick Cheney that a majority of citizens opposed the war in Iraq. Cheney replied, “So?”

    Martha asked, “You don’t care what the American people think?”

    He said, “NO.” Cheney then goes on to say that we can’t be subject to fluctuations in opinion polls.

    A White House spokesman was asked later if this meant the government didn’t think the public should have input. The spokesman remarked that the public has input every four years.

     

     

    sustainable exploitation

    An Ecosystem Report Card for the Georgia Coast

    by | Nov 15, 2015
    An Ecosystem Report Card for the Georgia Coast

    The Georgia Department of Natural Resources explanation for their most recent initiative to gin up support for their activities in the populace (“develop an environmental ethic,” in Spud Woodward, the Director’s words) reads as follows:

    The Coastal Georgia Ecosystem Report Card is an important tool for planning restoration activities and conservation. It provides a transparent, timely, and geographically detailed assessment of health in coastal Georgia…

     

     

    cry the benighted country

    What’s Gone Wrong in America

    by | Nov 11, 2015
    Today's Crazy Half Red and Half Blue Uncle Sam

    “Make America great again,” Trump says. Not a bad idea, but first we need to understand what’s gone wrong.

    In every society, both constructive and destructive forces are always at work. But the balance of power between those forces is not constant. Such factors as the quality of its leadership and the impact of its national experience can strengthen either the best or the worst in a society.

    Consider, for example, the peoples of Great Britain and Germany at two points in the twentieth century.

    In 1910, a time of relative stability before the outbreak of World War I, British society and culture might have been judged moderately healthier than the German…

     

     

    satire on the campaign trail

    Most Iowans Would Rather Have Bobby Jindal Do Their Brain Surgery

    by | Nov 10, 2015
    Dr. Ben Carson Dinosaur Wrangler

    Most Iowans would rather have Bobby Jindal perform brain surgery on them than Dr. Ben Carson, according to the latest Quinnipiac University Poll of registered Republicans in the state who either need brain surgery, or are undecided.

    A retired brain surgeon, Dr. Carson led in all previous polls in the key primary state that asked voters: “If you needed brain surgery, which GOP candidate would you want to perform it?” In the latest poll – coming in the wake of recent revelations about Dr. Ben Carson fabricating parts of his personal history and making bizarre statements about pyramids and other things – Iowa voters’ faith in the candidate appears to be shattered.

     

     

    bye, bye american pie

    Nuclear War & Environmental Catasrophe, Noam Chomsky & Laray Polk

    by | Nov 4, 2015
    Money Bags by Tom Ferguson

    In this collection of interviews and speeches the prolific Chomsky offers his insights on two critical items. Asked, what are the primary issues that should concern us?, he replies, “Nuclear War and Environmental Catastrophe.” There seems to be an idea in the air lately (see Naomi Klein’s book on climate change, This Changes Everything) that capitalism is incompatible with democracy and survival of our civilization. Chomsky elucidates how the most ruthless in the capitalist game…

     

     

    satire

    Researchers Say Fox News Causes Brain Damage in Rats

    by | Nov 3, 2015
    Brain damaged rat watching Fox News

    Researchers said Tuesday that watching Fox News caused brain damage in rats. They said they’re not sure what that means, but the results are conclusive.

    After watching “The O’Reilly Factor” and “Hannity” for six months the rats were never the same.

    “They got more hostile and I would venture to say more irrational,” said University of Wisconsin researcher, Ralph Phillips, who led the study that was published in the November issue of the science journal Mind Bender.

     

     

    threatens as much as war

    Why Climate Change Should be a Conservative Issue

    by | Nov 3, 2015
    Florida Climate Change Tourism by Mike Licht via flickr and used under a Creative Commons license.

    The word “conservative” means something different today than it used to.

    Conservatives have traditionally understood the importance of stability—and the dangers of disrupting the established order. They considered it a responsibility to preserve their heritage and pass it down intact to the next generation.

    Conservatives have been the guardians of tradition because they saw that what our forebears created is a great achievement, built with difficulty over time.

     

     

    bald faced untruth

    Marco Rubio’s Small Mammal Strategy Revealed

    by | Nov 2, 2015
    Marco Rubio - Caricature by DonkeyHotey via flickr

    Do Marco Rubio’s inhumanly large and pointy ears wiggle when he lies? That’s what it seemed like during last Sunday’s interview with John Dickerson on “Face the Nation.” Maybe it was just a trick of the television lens but there is reason to think that something almost fey about Rubio’s successful dissembling. Asked about possible political repercussions of failing to do what most Americans believe U.S. Senators are paid to do – to actually vote on legislation in the U.S. Senate – said, “I’m not a political strategist; I’m a candidate.” And he got away with that…

     

     

    presidential debates

    Hollywood Should be Watching

    by | Oct 31, 2015
    All the GOP Candidates as movie stars

    Hollywood these days seems to be in a serious rut. There is the occasional original and interesting new film, but for the most part studio heads apparently don’t like to take risk so we are constantly getting remakes of old films or one more in a series of previously successful movies.

    Another James Bond or Indiana Jones film makes perfect sense, but remakes of wonderful old movies are usually wholly unsatisfying and generally disappointing despite all the new technology available to fill them with moronic special effects.

     

     

    finding your roots

    The genial genealogist

    by | Oct 30, 2015
    The genial genealogist

    Henry Louis Gates Jr. is a professor of African-American studies and English at Harvard University, a literary scholar who writes for The New Yorker, The New York Times and other A-list publications and has 14 books on his resume. But most people know him as an enthusiastic, almost evangelical proponent of genealogical research thanks to Finding Your Roots, a popular PBS series in which he and his team have traced the lineage of notables ranging from Samuel L. Jackson to Barbara Walters to Georgia Congressman John Lewis.

     

     

    pause to pity

    Ben Carson’s Campaign Message is Jacked by the White Candidates

    by | Oct 29, 2015
    Dr. Ben's Medicine Show by DonkeyHotey via flickr and used under a Creative Commons license.

    Pause a moment to pity temporary front runner Ben Carson for his poor performance at the Third Republican-CNBC Debate in Boulder. Perhaps ‘non-performance’ is the right word. He was hardly a presence among the weirdly energized collection of candidates. So how did candidate Carson go from being the ‘great Evangelical hope’ to ‘doctor who?’ You only notice that Carson is boring when he is faced with any competition for attention on the stage. Between his soft, slightly slurred voice and the rambling illogic of his story-telling…

     

     

    satire on the campaign trail

    Bush Campaign Leaves Huge Crater in Arizona Desert

    by | Oct 29, 2015
    Flying elephants animated gif via Giphy.com

    When it crashed in the Arizona desert, it left a crater where there was once a Bush presidential bid.

    “I haven’t seen anything like this since Herman Cain in 2012,” said GOP astrophysicist Ted Billard as he examined the still-smoldering hole in the ground Thursday morning. “But Herman’s crater you could step across, about two feet. This one, we measured it, is a quarter of a mile across and 400 feet deep.

     

     

    on top of stone mtn

    Georgia to Build “We Exhibit – You Decide” Racial Strife Museum

    by | Oct 25, 2015
    Georgia Plans for Stone Mountain Covered Up

    Georgia plans to build a “We Exhibit – You Decide” racial strife museum atop Stone Mountain to address the state’s long and troubled history of discrimination against dozens of minorities and blacks by making it a tourist attraction.

    The museum will offer exhibits on both sides of the controversy over civil rights: people for them, and people against them.  And, instead of passing judgement, the museum will allow people to decide for themselves, said Georgia Governor Nathan Deal in an afternoon press conference.

     

     

    what is truth?

    20/20 Insight

    by | Oct 25, 2015
    20/20 Insight

    Every now and again in our grand world history, magnetic personalities have had insights so stirring they just had to try to share. These sharings sometimes resonated broadly and created movements based on the master’s teachings, as they understood, or misunderstood, them. The truth shall make you free, for example. MLK said it, not sure where he got it, Jesus? Dunno. This example so begs elaboration that all kinds of factions can get behind it. The truth for some is Jesus…

     

     

    satire on the campaign trail

    Republican Party Confirms George Bush Was Once President

    by | Oct 21, 2015
    George Bush - Caricature by DonkeyHotey via flickr

    The Republican Party confirmed Wednesday that George Bush was once President of the United States.

    “We’re just trying to clear the air and make it clear we’re all about transparency,” said GOP spokesman Frank Billingham. “There have been all these press reports that he was president and, rather than fan more speculation, we confirm that he was, indeed, President of the United States – but, let me emphasize, for the point of absolute clarity, it was a long, long, LOOOOOONG time ago.”

     

     

    poor school districts

    Fix SC education funding and stop caterwauling about deadlines

    by | Oct 21, 2015
    Fix SC education funding and stop caterwauling about deadlines

    You might not get much in your morning newspaper if reporters didn’t turn in stories by a certain time. Deadlines keep reporters — and columnists — on task. If there were not a specific time limit to submit a story for publication, the story might never get written. There’s always somebody else you can call or interview.

    Like newspapers, courts set deadlines frequently. Time limits provide some certainty in the often long, convoluted judicial process and move cases along toward conclusions…

     

     

  • Worthy of Comment



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    Artful Dodgers

    Artful Dodgers

    The video clip of Rep. Joe Wilson, R-S.C., shouting “You lie!” at President Barack Obama during his recent health-care speech before a joint session of Congress has now been replayed on various TV outlets a combined total of  5,237 times. This is admittedly an extrapolation on my part, based on my personally having seen the clip 353 times despite diligent rationing of my news-viewing hours, but I think the guesstimate is about right. It was during my 344th or 345th exposure to the questionably spontaneous outburst  and the President’s reaction – the surprise and then either rueful or wry amusement  Read on →
    Republican Corruption, Taxes, and Our Children

    Republican Corruption, Taxes, and Our Children

    I am a Democrat, and I am proud of it. However, the S.C. Press Association distributes this column, and neither they nor I want it to be a weekly partisan rant — there’s far too much of that in both our national and state politics already. That said, this column is about one thing: the corruption of the Republican leadership in the S.C. House of Representatives. Yes, that’s harsh. And, yes, at least in a sense, it’s partisan. But what they have just done with so-called “sales tax exemption reform” is, in fact, completely corrupt – and it should be labeled as such. Put  Read on →
    I Hope This Makes You Angry

    I Hope This Makes You Angry

    Today is the 49th anniversary of the televised signing of the Civil Rights Act at the White House. Leading up to the signing was the case of Brown v. Board of Education which was heard by the U.S. Supreme Court. The Court found that racial segregation of schools was unconstitutional in 1954. In the ten years that followed the case came the Montgomery bus boycott in 1955 and Martin Luther King, Jr.’s stunning “I have a dream” speech, symbolically delivered at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C., in 1963. The Civil Rights Act was a key component in the successful 1960 presidential  Read on →