Southern Funnies

Close your eyes and imagine for a moment. No, stop. That won’t work, you need to know more, so keep reading. Here’s the idea. A new prime time reality series based on another prime time series based on a successful European series and based on reality: Survivor Occupy Wall Street. A different show each night of each week.

Monday: Survivor Occupy Wall Street – Red State
Tuesday: Survivor Occupy Wall Street – Blue State
Wednesday: Survivor Occupy Wall Street – Toss Up State
Thursday: Survivor Occupy Wall Street – Los Angeles
Friday: Survivor Occupy Wall Street – Miami
Saturday: Survivor Wall Street – Las Vegas
Sunday: Survivor Wall Street – New York

Survivor Occupy Wall StreetBorrowed from CBS, the rules of Survivor Occupy Wall Street are simple: average Americans are abandoned in the middle of some of the most unforgiving places on earth – public parks near financial districts. Divided into teams, they participate in the daily routine of OWS – mic checks, speeches, seeking unanimity, listing grievances, protesting wealth disparity, chanting about tax fairness and student loans, protecting speech and human rights, being non-partisan, finding common ground, singing protest songs, attending rallies, making signs, marching, sitting-in, demonstrating, confronting police, blogging, tweeting, keeping the parks clean, sleeping in tents, publicly urinating, being used as backgrounds for media reports, staying out of jail, acting gratuitously toward politicians – plus, challenges given by host Jeff Probst. Every three days, the losing tribe must trek to Tribal Council to vote out one of their own. Halfway through the game, the challenges shift to individual competitions when the tribes attempt to find consensus to merge and become one. Now the game is every contestant for themselves while acting as if they are in solidarity for the people in the peaceful struggle against financial inequality.

The game is simple: Outwit, Outplay, Outlast, by winning immunity, thus not being eligible to have votes cast against yourself. However, the players must be careful about who they send packing – because after the merge, a jury of previously voted out contestants begins to form, and each week they return to watch the Tribal Council ceremony. At the end of the game, they vote for one of the members in the finals to win one million dollars and become the next Survivor to go from the 99% to the 1%!

Generally, each season begins with a twist – something different to surprise the new castaways. In our version, one team in each city is chosen by Fox News, the other by MSNBC. Survivor Occupy Wall Street is a game of struggle to reclaim power, adaptation of a coherent demands, and the final two or three of each season are the players most able to adapt to their surroundings and to the politics of the people they are playing with. Survivor focuses on the people, and the social commentary that surrounds them and their politics. The game revolves around how these players can Outwit, Outplay, and Outlast. Tonight they march to One Police Plaza.

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Lee Leslie

Lee Leslie

I’m just a plateaued-out plain person with too much time on his hands fighting the never ending lingual battle with windmills for truth, justice and the American way or something like that. Here are some reader comments on my writing: “Enough with the cynicism. One doesn’t have to be Pollyanna to reject the sky is falling fatalism of Lee Leslie’s posts.” “You moron.” “Again, another example of your simple-minded, scare-mongering, label-baiting method of argumentation that supports the angry left’s position.” “Ah, Lee, you traffic in the most predictable, hackneyed leftist rhetoric that brought us to the current state of political leadership.” “You negative SOB! You destroyed all my hope, aspiration, desperation, even.” “Don’t you LIBERALS realize what this COMMIE is talking about is SOCIALISM?!?!?!” “Thank you for wonderful nasty artful toxic antidote to this stupidity in the name of individual rights.” “I trust you meant “bastard” in the truest father-less sense of the word.” “That’s the first time I ran out of breath just from reading!” “You helped me hold my head a little higher today.” “Makes me cry every time I read it.” “Thanks for the article. I needed something to make me laugh this mourning.” “If it weren’t so sad I would laugh.” "... the man who for fun and personal growth (not to mention rage assuagion) can skin a whale of bullshit and rack all the meat (and rot) in the larder replete with charts and graphs and a kindness..."“Amen, brother.”