Southern Views

Cyber sex It just keeps getting worse.

I remember, it was not so long ago, when a sex scandal always involved actual sex. That is, penetration of somebody’s body somewhere by another somebody with some appendage of the second somebody’s person. That was it, pretty plain vanilla sex. The kinkiest it ever got was the penetration point being some orifice other than a vagina belonging to an inappropriate partner.

Now days, we can have a full blown sex scandal without the principals involved ever meeting one another, in the flesh that is. We can have a sex scandal without any form of actual physical contact. We have come to the place where we can have a full throated, kill the bastard, virtual sex scandal based upon the “relationship” of two people a continent apart who have never touched and never met, not in person.

We are the poorer for it. I am grieved for us that we have fallen so low, become so literally disconnected that we think cyber sex is sex.

Cyber sex is pointless titillation. Whether it is being served up by the unfortunately named Representative Weiner or Representative Chris Lee, the shirtless Republican of a few months back, it is just childish tomfoolery.

Granted, childish tomfoolery may well disqualify a person for Congress, though there is no known historical or current indication that is so. However, whatever the two Congressmen did on Twitter and Facebook, it wasn’t sex.

I don’t know about you, but I feel cheated. I want, at a minimum, some good old fashion fellatio involved with any sex scandal that is going to involve political disgrace. I would hope there would also be some seriously heavy fornication and, maybe, an occasional orgy thrown in to keep it interesting.

While I am on the subject, I want, at least once, one of our good old red-blooded American men who, upon finding themselves and their libidos in the cross hairs of the media glare, to stand up and say, “So what?” I want to hear some one say, “Of course I had sex with her (or ‘him’ if the media victim happens to be a woman or gay). She is young, beautiful, warm and willing and she thinks I am a god. Do you hear me, A GOD! Of course I had sex with her, any real man would have. I don’t regret it. I am sorry some bastard found out about it and felt the need to hurt my wife and children by telling the whole damn world about it but that is something I can’t help. There are a lot of assholes in the world and most of them have a website or work for a newspaper or television channel and there is nothing I can do about that. That is Thomas Jefferson’s fault.”

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Mike Copeland

Mike Copeland

I am old enough to know better. I have a B. A. from Birmingham Southern College and a Master's in City Planning from Georgia Tech. I have worked in SC State government for over a decade leaving as the Deputy Executive Director of the State Budget and Control Board, the state's administrative agency. I have owned the Fontaine Company since 1984 and am the managing member of viscerality.com.llc a management, marketing and consulting company.

I am the author of several novels, some of which you may buy and read if you are of a mind to do so.