Top Ten Reasons Southerners Vote Republican:

Republicans love God.

Republicans love zygotes.

Republicans love guns.

Republicans love war.

Republicans love money.

Republicans hate homosexuals.

Republicans hate immigrants.

Republicans hate black people.

Republicans hate taxes.

Republicans hate government.

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Cliff Green

Cliff Green

Cliff Green is a former writer for The Atlanta Journal. He worked there when it was a real newspaper. His accomplishments since include the fact that he has never watched a minute of reality TV, and he has never been inside a Starbuck's. He owns no device onto which he can download music, nor does he know how to record a television show. He is not sure what an iPhone is. He is proud of all the above.